It’s Friday! Hooray! I am so excited about this weekend. I think it is going to be one of the best weekends I have had in a long time. I am going to hang out with K.B., clean, decorate, take Sebastian to the park, RELAX!!!

**

I am in a really good happy mood today. Which is so refreshing. I feel like everything in my life is happening for a reason and that I should just let things take their own course. I am going to a Rainbow Youth meeting today. I haven’t gone in a long time because I don’t feel like I need it. It used to be my biweekly dose of gay, but now I am surronded by gayness. K.B. is advising this one, which is why we are going. She is in charge of the discussion and I am going to help. I hope that a lot of people show up. The topic is safe sex, which is always fun. We are going to bring some supplies too. Condoms, dental dams, and gloves. I feel like I am missing something. I’m sure I’ll remember soon. It should be really good.

***

Speaking of sex supplies I am working on becoming a consultant for Passion Parties as a 2nd job. That would mean I would sell sex toys and safer sex supplies at home parties. It is just like those Tupperware parties everyone used to have only with sex toys. I have also heard of people throwing the parties online so we can look into that if everything works out. I could do one over Xanga for all of you. Yay! They sell toys for men and women that fit into any sexual preference so anyone can purchase. I am very excited about this because one “dream job” I have is to work at Toys in Babeland. That would be awesome. Even if I have a really good high paying job I would still work there for fun. I would enjoy giving classes on things, helping people figure out what to buy, and helping them figure out what everything is. I would love that. I am supposed to be getting a package in the mail about the company and then I get to decide which package to buy. The size package that you purchase directly impacts the percentage you make from sales, but you can always upgrade. I will have to see what it is like next month after all things are paid off and I am back to normal.

****

I was going to go home last night, but I didn’t. K.B. and I went to a woman named Sally’s house to see how it looked after she remodeled it. It looked really good. We ended up staying for a really long time and I had a nice time talking to her. She is the same age as my sister, 29, so she kind of feels like a cool older sister to me. She showed us some pictures of her wedding which was really cute. She got married when she was 24 and he groom was 18. Her daughter was 5 at the time and was her flower girl. The pictures were so cute. *sigh*

******

Yay! We got in the big Quill office supply catalog today. Now this may not sound exciting to you, but to a secretary in need of things to work with it is wonderful. Also with a $60 order we get a tin of cookies and a digital camera. Hooray! I am going to set up that order now.

*******

I will end today with a silly survey.

-THOUGHT PROVOKING QUESTIONS-

If you could be any insect in any time period, what and where would you be? It would be this time period and I would be a ladybug b/c they are pretty and helpful in the garden.
What do you want to be when you grow up? Happy.
Are you intellegent? Yup.
Why do you drive on a parkway and park on a driveway? To make everyone wonder.
Do you like the President Of the United States? Nope.
Does Nilla Wafers in Pudding sound unappitizing to you? Not at all.
What are you avoiding by filling out this survey? Work.
Are you successful? I think so. I have wanted many things for myself and I feel like I am exactly where I should be. The road is bumpy, but well lite.
What is the funniest thing you have ever seen? Toothpaste for Dinner comics.
Do you like your life? Yes.
What is your greatest achievement? Moving out on my own.
What is your most embarrassing moment? I don’t embarrass easily.
Do you think that people are born heterosexual or that it is a society derived attribute aquired during the growth process? I think that straight people are born that way. I don’t know why they would “choose” to lead such a difficult lifestyle. I don’t think they can help it. They aren’t bad people and we should try to accept them.
-Random Questions-

Did you like the “Back to the Future” movies? Not at all.
Ghosts and Witches: umm…yes?
Do you like Micheal Jackson or do you think he is a has-been? He is a never was. At least for me.
Do you speak another language besides English? After 3 years of classes I can mumble a few words of German. Ich habe eine rosa schlange?
Do you find the “Iron Chef” humorous? Who?
Do you think that cheerleading is a sport? I guess.
What type of computer are you using right now? It’s a dell.
Do you own an article of clothing that is leather? Nope. Just a Louis Vuitton.
Did you buy that piece of clothing as a joke or do you wear it regularly? I only let the purse out sometimes. I love it more than I love my own parents.
Are you watching TV or listening to music right now? neither.
What does your hair look like right now? Messy, curlyish, pulled into a pony tail.
What time is it? It is 1:38 on Thursday. I am getting this part of the post set up for tomorrow. ewh! Secrets reveiled!
Do you enjoy Hanson’s music? Why or why not? I love Hanson. Their new album is quite good and emoish. I think they are swell.
-Personal Questions-

What is in your shower right now? *Deep Breath* 4 Shampoos, 3 conditioners, 1 special color care conditioner, 3 facial washes, 1 facial mask, 10 body washes, 2 kinds of shaving gel, 2 razors, and Dial soap. (Yes that is all mine) My roommate has a container of dial body wash and herbal essance shampoo.
How much of that do you actually use? All of it. I don’t like smelling like the same thing everyday so I mix it up.
What time do you wake up in the morning? 7 at my house and 8:30 at Kimberly’s
What is your daily routine? Wake up, go to work, go home, party, sleep.
Do you have a lot of friends? I have a ton of friends, but few close ones.
Do you have an actual best friend? Yes, but sometimes we sleep together. Does that count?
Do you live with anyone? Kyle!
Your room: umm…is cool.
What do you like most about yourself? My personality and my eyes.
Does your job suck? It dishes out cash. That is all that matters at this point.
Do you get along with your family? We pretend
Do you enjoy the people in your everyday life? To a point. Kimberly, Kyle, and the people I see at the gas station all rock.
Are you critical or gullible? both
Do you trust people? Why or why not? Not really. Their is so much to not trust.
What is in your purse/bag/briefcase right now? way to much
What defines the perfect partner for you? Ask Kimberly
-ECT-

How often do you get online? In am on Mon-Fri 9-5 b/c of work.
Do you write letters to people? yes
Are you afraid to ride in a plane? no
Are you tired? yes
Do you want to go to sleep? yes
Have you ever been in love? yes
Are you attracted to anyone? yes
Do you wish you had someone right now? Had them in what way? This question sounds dirty.
Are you away from home and do you miss it? Yes I am at work and I miss my house.
What is the best coffee you’ve ever had and where can I get it? yuk coffee
**********

This week has been going by relatively fast. I am suprised because on Monday it seemed like it was going to drag. Things have been unbelievably busy at the office and it’s not even the busy season yet. That makes me worried. I don’t want it to be busy. But hey it does make the day go by faster. I’ll stop complaining.

***

We didn’t end up going to the mall last night because we were in to much of a hurry to go home. We did stop at Wegman’s. She wanted to buy dinner to cook for me. She got me a steak, which was nice of her seeing as she is a vegetarian. She also bought some food for herself, smores stuff, nacho stuff, and miso soup. Yay! I love miso soup. We didn’t have the nachos or the soup yet. We will eat them the next time she comes over.

Then we went to my house which was so nice. I really missed it there. We made dinner, watched QAF, took a shower, and then went to bed…early. I’m not going to say much about this only that it was so great to have sex in my own house and not have to worry about noise.

This morning we kind of mosied around the house. We didn’t really want to go anywhere. I wished we could have stayed at home all day. Alas here I am. It is alright though. Tonight I am going back to my house, by myself. That will be nice. I haven’t been alone in a very long time. I think it will help me clear my head and relax. It will be good for K.B. to have some alone time as well. I have been over her house a lot lately and though she won’t admit it I am sure it is starting to weigh her down.

****

EDIT: I just received an e-mail about the house situation. I would say I’m upset, but actually I’m not. While I know that I should have talked to him directly about the situation before writing on my xanga, this is my journal and I have every right to discuss things here before talking to people. That is what journals are for it’s my thoughts and feelings. I have to sort things out before I get into it with the person. In this case I wanted feedback because I wasn’t sure if I was wrong or not. Anyway the letter said that they don’t want me to live with them anymore due to my “unstable financial situation”. That actually made me angry. I think I am doing pretty damn good. The fact that I have a beautiful apartment, a car that runs, a dog, bills, cell phone, etc… makes me feel pretty stable. Also the fact that I pay for all of that myself. When I go to college I will also be paying for that myself. I have things perfectly planned so that I can afford everything I need. However because I can’t pay a security deposit for a new place while I’m living at my old one and while I have car dept makes me unstable? I don’t really think so. These are also not excuses they are truths. I wish I had parents who paid for everything.

I do believe that this is all for the best and I feel relieved. I wanted to move in with them, but not if this is how it is going to be. Not if these are this is the mindset my “friends” have.

K.B. and I had a lovely night last night. We had dinner at her house and then I was feeling very nervous for some reason. I don’t know why and she could sense that so she asked me if I wanted to go anywhere and I said that I wanted to go for a drive with her. We ended up stopping at the Gallery of Sound in Mt.Pocono and K.B. bought Jay-Z’s new albulm and an older one by Liz Phair. Then we decided to go to Target in Bartonsville to walk around and look at stuff. We wondered around and joked about things for about an hour and a half before leaving. I was glad to see that my ex-boyfriend working since he and K.B. enjoy glaring at each other. Then we went back out to the car and drove home. We we got home K.B. went on her new computer and I read my new Bust magazine. Then I watched the RW and right after that we went to bed. However we were both still in really silly moods and I tried to get her to sleep on top of me and we were rolling around and just being crazy. It was awesome! We finally fell asleep around 12ish. So much for going to sleep early.

Tonight she is going to come over to my house. Yay! K.B. just got her check from the government so we are going to stop at the Wyoming Valley mall on the way and she is going to get new glasses. I’m excited! They are so awesome. They are by a company called Feather Wates and they are titanium. They look hot on her. She is also going to get transitions instead of a blue tint which is awesome b/c I will be able to see her gorgeous green eyes all the time. Woot!

********

It’s quite rainy here. Hopefully that will clear up soon. It was thundering on the way in today. I’m sure it will be bright and sunny by time I am leaving work today at 5.

Also my mood today is annoyed about things pertaining to yesterdays post, but I am in no mood to talk about it. Angie’s Mood = Annoyed yet Happy.

*********

Ok I probably shouldn’t be writing about this hear because the person who it involves reads this, but considering what I wrote yesterday it doesn’t really matter. If it bothers me then I should talk about it. So I am getting this apartment with my friends A.S. and Jill. I’m excited about this for many reasons and I think it will be great. They have been the ones looking at apartments and houses. I haven’t even seen the one that they choose. I was also not informed about the security deposit. After the place was chosen and we all decided on it I was told that I would need to pay my part of the security deposit ASAP. That is $166. I realize that it isn’t a lot of money, but for someone who owes $1,000 for car problems to her parents and thus is making $150 a week after they have taken out their part it isn’t good. Plus I have gas, food, rent, and insurance to worry about. To top things off I am not moving in until December. There is a chance I could be moving in in August, but it is a slim chance that relies on K.W. getting into a college in Boston. So shouldn’t I be giving them my money before I move in? It doesn’t make sense to me to give them money half a hear before I even move in. A lot can happen before then. This doesn’t sound like anything I have ever heard before. It doesn’t sound fair to me at all. Does anyone else have any impute on this? Am I wrong? I just don’t feel right giving out money I don’t have this far before actually moving in. I have an apartment right now. I have my own bills to pay. I don’t live with my parents like they do. It really makes me not want to move in with them at all. I have to e-mail A.S. back soon to tell him about this weekend, but I need to wait a little while because I’m kind of peeved.

**

So most of the population is effected by a demonish plant called Poison Ivy. However I am not. Some might say this is a good thing. Some would be happy to find this out about themselves, but not me.

It all started on a cool morning in 1998. I was at the bus stop with about 6 other kids. We were bored, tired, and sick of school. One of the younger ones amongst us a sixth grader moved to the side of a building that was there so that she could light her cigarette. Moments later we heard her exclaim that she had found poison ivy. She grabbed a bunch of it and ran back towards us. We thought what any dumb kids our age would have thought. Great! Poison ivy is awesome. If we rub this all over our face and arms we can get out of school for a few weeks. What’s better than that? So everyone started rubbing the stuff on including myself. Then the bus finally came and we all journeyed merrily to school. By the end of the day everyone was fully broken out in rashes and had been sent home early. Except me. All of the kids at my bus stop got to stay home for 2 weeks while I was stuck in school, because I am unaffected by poison ivy.

In retrospect now that I’m older it was a really dumb thing to do and poison ivy is serious stuff, but still. A ruined childhood moment.

**

**

What the hell happened on the challenge???? The RR won with 8 people and Katie!?! I know what caused the downfall. C.T. He is strong, but doesn’t work well with others. I blame him. Guess we’ll just have to wait until next time.

This post is just how I feel right now. It is not mean\’t to hurt anyone.

***

It is yet another Monday. I wish it was Sunday. I started off with a comic due to the fact that I feel a little sad today and I wanted to lighten this post up a bit. I am not quite sure. K.B. and I had a fight and I don’t know… I just have this feeling like we keep pushing away the inevitable. Is love really all you need? I know that I love her. Passionately. I also know that she loves me. She is always so good to me and thoughtful and everything that I could ever want. The only bad part is how we fight. We have horrible fights. I doesn’t even make sense most of the time, but they are horrible, emotional destructive fights. We also fight a lot. A little thing that neither of us really even care about can balloon into this especially unbearable fight. I hate it. I also have to wonder if I am really who she needs. I know that we both mean a great deal to each other, but can that make a life together work? I truly do not know. I just feel sad. We are opposites and up until this point I believe that has been one of our strong points. Like I want to make a commitment to her. I want to marry her and get a house together. However she feels that we are to young and we can possibly know what we want yet. Me I don’t really care about being young. I could die next week. I want to begin. If things don’t work out then we separate and move on. It doesn’t make sense to me that she wouldn’t feel right about settling down while being young because she wants to be treated like an adult with everything else. Although I do think that she might be holding back to protect me. Perhaps she already knows this is a doomed relationship and she is just holding on until she sees that I am alright. If things end I will be upset, but I won’t be upset forever. I will be happy to have had her in my life and I will stay friends with her for a long time. I will always be part of her family and she mine. Everything will work out. I know it will.

***

I think today is going to be good. K.B. is working tonight with Oz and M.E. and I am going to visit them for a while which will be nice. Then I am going to clean K.B.’s room to surprise her. (I really hope she doesn’t read this before then.) I am going to make it look spotless. Yay! Then we will hang out for a little while and then we are going to watch the RW/RR Challenge. I will be cheering for the RW! I really do think that they will win this year being that Katie made it to the final mission and is pissed. She is a strong competitor when she wants to be. I think she could kick ass on the final mission, but she is defiantly not going to after her team tried to screw her over so much. I think that the Real World team should give her some money after they win, since it will be mostly because of her that they won. I also hope that Coral does well. She really needs to prove herself again after ruining it for the team last year. Spider bite and all. It\’s going to be a really good Inferno I can\’t wait. I do wish they would start casting interesting people on both shows agian. These new people they get just really get on my nerves. I\’m already sick of the new RW. Stupid Frankie.

***

So they did come for lunch yesterday and then I ended up leaving work early at 12:30 to go out with them. Yay! I had a great time. We went to The Crossings and stopped at Sunglass Outlet where K.W. and I used to work and the old assistant manager T.M. was working and she is now the manager. Then we went Vans and Gap. After that it was off to Stroudsburg so K.W. could give them a car payment and then we stopped at Hi-Tech Outlet b/c the one guy there said he had new car shit to show K.W. That guy wasn’t there so we went to Target to look around. I wanted flipflops, but they didn’t have any I liked. K.B. bought me the movie I am Sam, a Vanilla coke, and a Wonderball. She is the best girlfriend in the whole world. Even if she isn’t really my girlfriend. Then we got some chinese from Winner’s. After that we went back to K.B.’s house and talked, ate chinese and watched I am Sam. It was a good night.

********************************

I’m not feeling to well this morning however, but hopefully I will be feeling a lot better soon. I’m sure it’s just a morning thing. I also heard back from the auto shop last night and they had sent my acelorator out for testing to see what was the matter and it came back completely fine. So I left it there for one more night to find if anything else is the matter so I should be getting her back tonight. That makes me happy. I have missed her. When I get her back I am going to clean her out and make her look great. Then I am going to really work on keeping her healthy. I need her!

********************************
I am excited today. Like happy excited and there is no reason for me to be. I just have this feeling like today is going to be great. I love feeling this way. Even if nothing happens and it turns out to be just like every other day I think it will be better anyway just because of my mood. I should be in this mood more often. Everyone should be. Yay!!!!!

**********************

Did everyone else hear what Gwyneth Paltrow & Chris Martin chose to name their new baby daughter? Well I will tell you Apple Blythe Alison Martin. Word really can’t describe what I felt when I heard that name. It seems celebrity baby names have taken a turn for the worst this year. Deacon, Ryder Russell, Rowan Francis, and Roman Walker.

Warning!! The girl writing this blog is real and thus has real thoughts and opinions. That said this post might offend some of you bitches so beware. If you are not offended and agree with me then you are fabulous and in the club. Get that rad stamp on your hand and get your ass in the door. Angie’s world is the only world. Am I conceited? Hell yea! Wouldn’t you be if you were me?

****************************************************************

I tend to be an offensive person. I know this and sometimes people say I should change it about myself and be more careful with what I say around people. You know what though? Screw that! I have to pretend to be someone else so much that when I have an opportunity to be myself in public I am just going to let loose. I’m a fag! I’m a girl! I am sexual! I am not going to pretend to be a quite submissive typical white female just to make everyone feel secure with their own identites and stereotypes. Some people don’t like how feminine I am. You know what? I love the way I am. I love that I am so feminne because it confuses people. They look at me and see a colorful ditsy little straight girl. However I am smarter than I would ever have them know. I may seem ditsy, but I am far far from it. I feel uncomfortable in pants and love to dress up and wear make-up. I would wear heels if they didn’t make me feel to tall and this disarms people. It takes them out of there safe zone. People who are prejudice and biggoted have certain stereotypes and ideals that they cling to and when those things are disproved it confuses and alarms them. I love that.

It’s like “Yea asshole I’m a girl, and a faggot, I don’t smoke or do drugs, I wear skirts, I have safe sex and lots of it, and you know what else? I am happier than you can ever imagine. On my worst day I am happier that you on your best day. Also don’t tell me about god hating gay people because your only screwing yourself. I’m sure he’ll be pretty pissed at you when you get up there for flinging his name around and saying he hates anything. Also if there is a god then cool when I die me and him will play pool, shoot the breeze and talk about how awesome being gay is. We will also steal jesus’ sandals and laugh about it.”

I don’t care where I am. I could be in front of a church after it has just let out and all the conservatives are talking on its steps. If I feel like kissing my girlfriend or taking about a great new lube I got I am going to do that. If I want to talk about how big of an asshole our president is or how horrible the war is I could be standing next to the white house. I really don’t care. I have never lived my life to please others and I am sure as hell not going to start now.

Sorry about all that I just really had to rant.

So you know this girl? Well you should! It’s Angela Anaconda. She rocks, mainly due to the fact that her name is Angela. hehe.

~****~

I am still working on my last name. The one that I am going to choose as my new last name, due to the fact that I hate my real last name passionately. So I have been looking and looking for this perfect new last name. I am beginning to think that it will be Bright. That sounds really nice and it was part of my Aunt Ella’s last name. Her last name was Fullbright and she has always mean’t the most to me out of all of my family members. I think it would be a great way to bring her name closer to me. So my name would be Angela Bright. Yay!

~****~

So In car news poor Marilyn needs a new alternator. Lukily the guy who owns No-Tech needs a new alarm system put in his home so we are going to work it out in trade and the cost to me is going to be $70. At this point just add it to the pile. Sometimes I think about what I have gotten myself into moving out so soon, but I really do think it was a good experience for me. I know I would have a lot of money right now if I had not moved, but I just needed to get out of my parents house. Hopefully K.W. will get into NorthEastern and we can end out lease with Mayflower Crossings. Then I will be moving to Canadensis with A.S and Jill and my rent will be a lot lower.

~****~

In other news while looking at aparment sites online I found my house. I am the top big window on the right. That window leads to our living room and the little window to the right is K.W’s bedroom. An interesting thing I noticed while looking at this picture is that our apartment doesn’t have the two air conditioners and neither does our lower left neighbor so this picture was most likley taken a while before we even lived there. If I find more pictures of our house I’ll post them.

~****~

K.B. is the most amazing person in the world. I love her soo much!!!!!!! Even though we have a strange unconventional non-relationship sort of thing going on she is so great to me and she is so supportive. We both have our weak spots and things we need to work on, but in the end she compliments my personality so well. I appreciate her and everything she does for me and I hope that she feels the same way about me. I just wish I could give her so much more than I do or even can. I want to make her life feel magical and perfect and I want her to be so happy. Hopefully one day that will happen. Things seem to be rolling along in her life and that is exciting. It is neat watching her do many things and suceed at them all so well. She is who I look up to most. I don’t know where I would be if I had never met her, but it wouldn’t be a good place. She makes me feel beautiful and smart and everything that I want to be. She also always makes me feel like I can do anything I want. I made this green bacause that is the color of her beautiful eyes.

She is my everything.

~****~

On a completely different note I am ANTI-INDIGO!!!

It is not a real color it was made up when Sir Isaac Newton upon his feeling that there could not be six colors in the rainbow because it was “the devils number”. So he created the color indigo to make rainbows as holy as they should be. This annoys me to no end. It is also part of the reason that on PRIDE flags we keep it to the original six colors.

Just say No To Indigo!

~****~

My boss came back in today, but he is still really sick from his opperations. I think it would be best if tomorrow he just stayed at home. For his sake and my own. Listening to someone puking in the bathroom is not my idea of muzak.

~****~

K.W. is going to Florida for a week so he won’t be around the apartment. He also just go into an accident in his car as well. He was rear-ended on the highway. So I’m going to miss him. We have spent so much time together lately and he is really growing on me. He feels like family. Crazy and highly disfunctional, but family none the less. I’m going out with him and K.B. on Thursday for a little while to hang out. That should be nice.

~****~

I found a really awesome recipe for Strawberry Rhubarb Pie which is my favorite food in the world. I also found a recipe for Strawberry Rhubarb Jam so I am going to make some up and store them. Yay! I am very excited about this. Hopefully I won’t screw it up.

Over the weekend I was thinking a lot about my future and what goals I have in mind. So I created a list to help keep me focused. Somethings may seem a bit silly, but they are all things I really want to have or do.

~*Thirty Things I Want To Do By Time I\’m 30*~

1. Have a career that I am proud of and that I enjoy.
2. To be happy and comfortable with who I am no matter what.
3. Have a wardrobe that compliments my personality.
4. Either give birth to, adopt, or foster a child/ren.
5. Have my name legally changed.
6. Get a monroe peircing.
7. Get a half sleeve tattoo that reflects my younger days.
8. Own a peice of Tiffany\’s jewelry.
9. Help someone achieve something.
10. Learn to knit. (finally)
11. Come out to my family.
12. Live in a different state.
13. Visit another country. (Asia, Europe, Africa, Australia)
14. Visit the west coast.
15. Volunteer at a good organization.
16. Cook often and learn to do it well.
17. Learn how to make my own clothing.
18. Live independently for a time.
19. Read at least 10 books I wouln\’t normally read.
20. Finish College.
21. Begin to floss daily.
22. Focus on my art more.
23. Grow my hair really long and then cut it all of on a whim.
24. Make a scrapbook w/ my photos.
25. Become a vegan.
26. Work on my math skills.
27. Take more pictures everyday.
28. Become more active.
29. Buy a house.
30. Have money saved in the bank.

So those are my goals for my future. I am confident that I can acheive them all.

——————————————————————————–

I didn\’t get a chance to meet up w/ Nicole. I left that morning and before I even got out to the highway my check engine light came on. I called Nu-Teck where I took it to have the Camshaft and they said they would need to hook it up to their computer b/c they might have to clear out a code. So I can\’t drive very much until I get that done on Monday morning. *blah*

——————————————————————————–

\”Another failed interview.\”

——————————————————————————–

I stumbled upon this new site that gives 5 questions everyday for your blog. So I am going to begin to do so. If you want to join the party the questions can be found here.

A Fashion Don\’t

Should you wear white after Labor Day?: Absolutely. I think white is the perfect winter color because it accents the snow and looks so magical and pristine. White after labor day is a wardrobe must.
Do you wear sandals with socks?: No, but I also don\’t wear sandals. I am sure that if I did I would absolutely rock socks with them.
Panty lines must be avoided at all costs. (t/f?): It depends on what you are comfortable with and what makes you feel sexy.
Do you own a little black dress?: Nope. As much as I love skirts I don\’t own a single dress.
Favorite article of clothing?: I\’m not really sure. I guess my black tights b/c I wear them so much, but I can see my new pink terry cloth hoodie becoming my new staple.