I would just like to put on record for the world to know that I got my period today at work. I was unprepared even though I knew it would come today thanks to this website and thus I have folded papertowels in my panties until I can get home to all of my happy menstral supplies. Ugh! I feel like a 14 year old girl in junior high school again because to my memory that is the last time I had to resort these measures.

Do you play Sudoku? Really, do you? I want to know. I was a self-proclaimed loather of the game until my cousin taught me a super easy way to figure out the puzzles. Now I don’t even need to use the long handed formula to solve the puzzles because I have been playing it all the freaking time. It is very addictive. I’ll get bored for a moment so I think, “Ahh…I might as well do some Sudoku.” Then I’ll start and I will have to finish it and then I get thrown into another on. I bought a book from Barnes & Noble when the printed-off-the-internet ones my cousin gave me were depleted. I have done 24 puzzles since I bought the book Sunday night. This is in between working and detailing my make-up bag contains to the general public. I can’t get enough. I am sure I will be starting another one just as soon as this post is completed.

My parties haven’t been so hot this month so I cancelled my participation in the leadership calls this time. I’ll be rejoining next round. It is just too much for me right now and I’m getting frustrated with the whole thing. I still love doing the parties though when I can actually get out to one. It’s the inconsistency and basing my work on other people that I am not so thrilled with. It’s also so very far out of my comfort level for me to call people and I think I need a bigger contact list anyway. The loyal customers I do have I just love and would do anything for. It really means a lot to me when people use me to send gift to their friends and family and I have they are happy with the service l give.

I am having problems getting my tattoo. I guess I just think about things so much. I am wondering how I will feel about it when I am my mother’s age and then my grandmother’s age. Will I still be happy with it and proud of it? (For those of you who don’t know about it I have been designing my third tattoo for a little over a year now. I have paid over $100 for it so far. It’s going to be fall colored leaves blowing in the wind across my left arm. It’s going to go from my shoulder to my elbow.) My other two tattoos are almost never shown because they are in places usually covered by clothing (the top of my left shoulder and the top middle of my back) so when I do get to show them off I am more than happy to do so. I just wonder what the future ramifications of my new tattoo might be. However it might be a much different world when I am my mother’s age and tattoos may be viewed in a very different light. In any case I think I am going to set the date soon. I would really to at least get the ball rolling once again on my design.

Tonight I am going over to my friend Kyle’s house because he is going back to school in a few days. The Mrs. is going to come over after she is done at work (7pm) so it should be a nice night.

I got this great idea from VeryMom!

I am going to go through my make-up bag and show you all of the make-up I use on those rare occasions I actually put it on. I usually only wear make-up when I am doing a party for The Body Shop or when I am going out somewhere nice.

That is my plain old boring make-up bag. It came in my big tote for The Body Shop. I usually put on my make-up at work in my office so it’s usually spread through my varied cosmetic bags.

Behold! My make-up!

• 1. I always want to make sure my skin is clean before I apply my make-up so I keep these Vitamin E Cleansing Cloths and the Vitamin C Daily Moisturizer with SPF 15.
• 2. I then use my All in 1 Face Base shade 03. The shade is a bit too dark for my skin, but I use it all the time anyway. I apply it with the Face and Body Brush which I dampen with the Vitamin C Facial Spritz pictured on number 8. I like to apply is damp so it gives heavier coverage. I finish it off the Tea Tree Oil Powder in light which they no longer make.
• 3. Then I start on the eyes. I use the Lightening Touchin shade 01 on my under-eyes and the inside corners of my eyes. This reflects light and makes me look like I sleep and am not on crack. Sometimes I will also use those Shimmer Waves in Peach to do the same thing. Then I apply my Cheek Color in Golden Pink which has pretty flecks of gold in it on my cheeks. I apply it with my Blusher Brush
• 4. Then I put color on my eyelids. This is where I lay things on heavy. I like a lot of eye color. I use my Shimmer Cubes in Warm. I usually mix all four colors. I apply them sometimes with this Eyeshadow Brush, but usually with my Mini Brush Kit. That one has more tools to perfect the look I am going for.
• 5. My other item I use a lot of is the Super Volume Mascara this gives the same look and effect as fake lashes with out the glue and confusion. Magical! I use about 3 coats of the Black. Also shown here is my Kinetin Illuminating Eye Treatment. That helps more with my under-eye darkness.
• 6. I have lip issues. I feel ridiculous with anything, but gloss on my lips. However sometimes I realise lipstick is nessesary. So I use Lip Color in shade Plum very very lightly with my Retractable Lip Brush then I finish with Crystal Balm in 01.
• 7. If I am feeling a bit more feisty I will apply Brush On Shimmer Beads in Gold very lightly to give me some shimmer.
• 8. On days I go light on foundation and I don’t use the beads I use this Skin Illuminator to give my skin a pretty glow. I also always finish with a spritz on the Vitamin C Facial Spritz. This sets my make-up and keeps it in place.

So those are all the products it take to become polished Angie. All the products are, of course, The Body Shop mainly because I work there. I also tend to be very brand loyal with nearly everything, but I’m not sure why.

It might have been nice to also have a before and after picture of myself. Maybe I’ll post one this week.

I highly suggest you do this on your own site and then leave me a link so I can be entertained. Thank you!

Things are going pretty well with me right now. The internet at the office is down and that is stressing me out because I really use the internet quite a lot at work. So what have I been doing to fill time? Watching movies on my laptop. I did do all of the filing. Pretty much filing and answering phone is the bulk of the work. The other stuff only gets done as needed and I do each project as soon as I get it so it’s perhaps 5-10 minutes a project. Not enough to fill a day with. I am hoping it will be fixed when I get to work tomorrow morning.

The air conditioning broke again last week, but I choose to spare you my complaints and it is fixed again now anyway.

I heard that they are finding out that dying your hair can cause cancer, which really big deal they say everything causes cancer. How-freaking-ever I really don’t wish to bring anything on myself. If I know that something I am doing specifically causes cancer than I really don’t want to do it. So I am thinking of pushing my next dye job off as much as possible and maybe even letting my natural color show for the first time since I was 14.

I like that I am goal oriented, but I think sometimes it scares me and I freeze. I set all of these goals and standards for myself and when I don’t achieve them or they seem to daunting I just don’t know what to do and it has lead to many breakdowns. I’m scared. I worry that the things I want most from life are the things I’ll never have and I don’t think I want very much. I want three basic things:

• To be successful at a job.
• To have a home.
• To have children.

That really is all. We’ll see. Perhaps I just need to relax and be patient. I would also like to be more spiritual, but it is so hard to find a religion that I feel good about that matches my beliefs. I guess I would really just have to research more.

I also had some major setbacks this week. A woman told me she was going to join so I drove to New Jersey to meet with her, gave her a coupon for a discounted kit and then she e-mailed me two days later and said she was no longer interested. Then I had another party cancel. I want so much to do well at this. I’m going to keep going and keep trying, but those occurances did get me down and I haven’t really delt with them yet.

The air conditioning is working at the office once again and I am back from Kentucky. Conference was wonderful and I learned so much. It really made me appreciate my job more and realise how much of a wonderful opportunity this is. I am even working on earning a trip to Waikiki, Hawaii! I get double points this month for everything I sell and I also get points for people joining my team which is just fantastic. I love that I get to share this opportunity with other people and help them change their lives for the better and I am still able to benefit from it. So I am going to be working hard for Hawaii this month. I have until August 31st and then I have to wait until Jan 1st to start working towards it again.

I am also doing a funraiser right now with some new Body Shop items. We just started selling the Bag For Life. I absolutely love this bag and it benefits people in so many ways. For instance:

• $2.00 from every bag sold goes to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, an organization working to stop violence in the home.
• Every time you use this bag and refuse a new plastic bag, you’re helping protect the planet.
• It’s made by Teddy Exports, our fantastic Community Trade supplier in southern India. Thanks to you choosing Community Trade products like this, Teddy has been able to build a hospital and school for 300 children.

The other new BUY A PRODUCT, SAVE A LIFE item is the FANTASTIC Daisy Soap. This smells really light and amazing. I love flower scents and this one isn’t overpowering at all. It’s really pretty. It’s going to replace my shower gel as my daily body cleanser. Plus this item also helps people in need.

• All of the proceeds from every Daisy Soap you buy will go directly towards helping save children from the long term affects of domestic violence.
• It also contains Community Trade shea butter from Ghana!

I am so excited to be able to offer these new products at my shows instead of just the Mint Lip Care Stick, which is also great because $2 from every purchase goes to the National Domestic Violence Hotline, but not everyone uses chapstick. I like having more of a variety.

I got a ton of free new products at the conference including the new Aloe face care range, which I love so much I am actually sad I don’t have dry/sensitive skin. I am going to get some of the Aloe body line. I used some of the new Caring Body Balm, sort of like an intense Body Butter, and it was AMAZING! It is completely unscented and I used it on one of my elbows and the next day after I took a shower I could still feel the difference between my two elbows. I have to get some of that! I am planning on buying the whole collection this month while it’s 25% off. I am really looking forward to trying it on my legs after I shave. That is when I need moisture the most. Plus the whole Aloe body line clinically proven for sensitive skin, dermatoligist recommended, fragrance-free, preservative-free, and fragrance-free. Not to mention that The Body Shop is now the only company in the world to use Community Trade Aloe. We get ours from the Guastatoya area of Guatemala.

I don’t want to talk to much about conference, but it was very exciting and now I can’t wait to earn the incentive trip to Hawaii and I am also planning on going to conference again next year when it’s in Orlando, FL.

I know many of you were interested in getting the new Make-up and it’s now online. Go ahead and check it out. If you would like one of my new catalogs mailed to you just let me know.

I am in Kentucky right now and I can assure you it is 100% nothing special. I walked around the city for about an hour and a half today and I didn’t like it much. I mean it has a nice small town feel for a city, but it isn’t my cup of tea.

I have been having a fun time at the conference so far. I am getting a bunch of great info and I have three classes to go to tomorrow. I do know the new holiday scent and it is fabulous. I am not saying a peep about it anywhere else than my parties until it launches. I will say they have two old holiday favorites returning and one new collection. I will say that all the new scents are available in hand washes!! I love hand washes so that is fantastic to me.

I am very tired though. You don’t want to see me tomorrow. I most likely won’t get to sleep until 2 a.m. tonight and I have to get up at 6:30 a.m. tomorrow. Ahhh! If you know anything about me, you know that I love to sleep.

I am happy and having a great time. I think next year will be even better. I am hoping to bring a team of my own to conference. That would be so fun and amazing.

It is 84 degrees inside of my office. Eighty-four degrees. I also have two dogs in here with me because my boss is using a flea bomb at his house. I am wearing a long sleeve button down shirt with a beige tank top underneath. I am also wearing an army green skirt that falls a little past my knees. Thank goodness I wore flip-flops today or we could have a problem. I believe my deodorant stopped working 5 degrees ago. I also have two little fans on me and while one is pink they are not cooling me off for shit. SAVE ME! The air conditioning guy was here yesterday and twice so far today, but he hasn’t been able to fix it.

On the plus side we were having a millipede outbreak for the past two weeks and today the only ones I have seen have been dead. My theory: Heat exhaustion. If only I could be so lucky.

Do you know why I normally appear to be in a sullen/melancholy mood? I always write in this thing at work? I should stop doing that. I am also happier when I am at home. I enjoy being home quite a lot. The Mrs. and I have an air conditioner. If you could make an air conditioner into a person I would make sweet love to it for hours just to be kept cool.

Okay. I don’t really know what I am doing with this site. Having something that seems so professional and public seems to have stunted my ability to write. I used to have no problem writing two or three entries even in one day because it was just me talking things out and I didn’t have to deal with my fear of never being good enough. I never say any of the things I normally say that everyone I talk to in “real life” think is really funny. I don’t because I don’t want you to think I’m trying to be funny and I don’t want people to think what I am saying is stupid.

I have also recently been stunted in the area of e-mail writing. (Sorry to Steve most specifically here.) I think everything the other person says is just perfect and interesting and I don’t know what to say and I don’t know how much about myself to disclose because I really don’t want to be boring. I am becoming a much crazier person since high school ended. I don’t thing I used to be this insane. I think way too much about conversations to the point where I could be construed as Chandler in that episode of Friends with the blackout. In that episode he is stuck in an ATM vestibule with some sort of model and he just can not say anything to her. While I watched that episode I was so annoyed at him and then I realized that I pretty much, to a lesser degree, have the same problem. I think everything I should be saying and at times I need to shout at myself inside my head to get anything out. Okay? That is my conversational problem. Now it seems to have spilled over into an online problem. I used to write entries and e-mails pretty much all day. Do you know what I am doing now? I am compulsively checking my e-mails, myspace, watching Dr.Katz on DVD and listening to classes for The Body Shop. Pretty much I am saying all of this because I needed to force myself to write something today and this is what I need to write about first.

I noticed my problems getting worse when my cousin dragged me to our local carnival and I was so saddened to be there. I only went because I know she really wanted someone to go with and she always does nice things for me. However the whole time I was there I was thinking about how I could be at home doing things I enjoy. I have started to enjoy being alone perhaps to much. I am happy to spend time with some of my friends one on one, but when it comes to me making the first step to set something up I can’t because why would they want to spend time with me. That is also exactly the type of self-lothing that I abhor.

The air conditioner is broken at work again so all day I am hot and sweaty and I hate being sweaty and hot. I am prone to wearing long jean skirts and sweater sets and right now it is to hot to wear a sweater so I am wearing a shell and that makes me so uncomfortable.
This one guy who works at a pizzeria next door comes over and starts to hit on me, but it makes me uncomfortable because I am nervous around men who are a lot older than me. (Meaning I am 22 and he is 31.)
I wonder if it’s normal for me to feel this way? I am much more comfortable around teenage boys.

Tonight I am going to dinner with my older sister and her boyfriend. She got fired at the pizzeria so I don’t eat there anymore and she is now working at a tennis center in a fancy development in my town. So I am getting to see her more now.

The conference is coming up soon for The Body Shop at Home and I am thrilled to pieces. I also just found out that the hotel we are going to has free wifi in every room. I think that is wonderful. You can all count on updates from my trip. Also I now have my camera working so I will be taking loads of pictures. I only “know” two other women out of the over 1,000 that will be in attendance. That is still only 10% of our consultants. My upline will be going. She and I are driving down to Kentucky together. My other upline who I speak to often via phone and e-mail is also attending so it will be nice to see her in person. I would really like to get my hair done and I wanted to have something decent to where to our cocktail party, but I guess I’ll be fine the way I am. I’m really also looking forward to the mini vacation. I know it’s only four days, but I think it will be really splendid.

I uploaded some more pictures onto flickr so if you want to see bad pictures of me and some flowers click away at the picture on this entry.

If you are bored I spent a good chunk of time today fixing up my book page. I added my opinion of all the books the one I read last month and also the name of the book I am currently enjoying.

I will try and get my shit together and have a decent entry for tomorrow and also an e-mail for Steve who is fabulous.