I am starting a new job. I have been considering doing Lia Sophia parties since I heard my upline with The Body Shop at Home was starting it back in April. I thought about it for a while and I finally had a party with her on September 16th. Everyone I showed the catalog to loved something and they were all so enthusiastic about it that I thought it was really something I should consider more realistically. We had the party and it was GREAT! So much easier to set up than TBSAH and it went quick. She talked about the jewelry’s Lifetime Replacement Guarantee, the sales going on and then we played two games and looked at all the jewelry. I decided then and there to do it. I have said in the past that TBSAH is the only at home show I would ever consider doing so if I have started a new one you know it must be huge.

I will also get my kit for free if my sales reach $650. I am almost there. I just need about $230 in additional sales and my party closes on Friday. I also have 3 shows booked so far which is a really great start. I also haven’t added in my sister’s order and my order so I am thinking I will only need to get $100 more in orders, which isn’t that much. I’m so excited about this! Also, if my party gets to $650 I’ll get $260 in FREE jewelry! Plus I get to pick 4 pieces at $15 and 2 pieces at 50% off. It’s a really awesome hostess program so I can’t wait to be able to get all of that free jewelry. That is every single thing on my wish list and then some.

If you are interested in more information of seeing if you want to order from my party visit www.liasophia.com/sites/rosemahler. When it asks for the hostess name put in Kristen. I will have your order shipped right to your home. Only order if you are really interested. I know a lot of you like to help me out and I really appreciate it, but I don’t want you to get something you won’t love. The jewelry looks even better in person too!

So that is my newest endeavor. I’m excited about it and I own almost no really jewelry so owning nearly an entire catalog worth of it will be so fun.

I’m not stopping TBSAH so don’t worry about that. I love it to much and I need my bath and body supplies. I love them!

In all the hussle and bussle of trying to find myself I almost forgot my favorite way of bonding with this website. Seeing how some crazy people got here!

This month was much more tame which means I must be keeping my vulgarities and sex talks to a minimum. Good for me!

Here are my favorite things people searched for that brought them here:

1. functional relationship in pizza hut
2. do apples have as much caffeine as coffee
3. babysitting for my boss / he touch my bra
4. is there a wocket in your pocket?
5. how to make medical grade silicon
6. fishy angela*
7. clothes from guastatoya

*I am not!

This is the third installment of posts based on my workbook. I have one more until it becomes one a week. Also I spent a good portion of the morning redoing my Book Page so it includes picture links and it’s easier to read. I also just finished The Crimson Petal and The White by Michael Faber and I am now reading A Tree Grows in Brooklyn by Betty Smith.

What happens when you feel uncomfortable? When I feel really uncomfortable I really retract into myself. I find it very hard to speak and I can’t think of anything good to say. I think nothing I have to say is good enough. I get very nervous and I feel very unintelligent. I often take very long pauses because my mind is racing, but words just will not come out. I also just can’t function and be myself.

How do you avoid discomfort? I avoid discomfort by avoiding uncomfortable situations. I will about people, phone calls, fights, parties, stores, the movies, concerts, etc…

What do you have in your life and what do you exclude from your life in order to avoid discomfort? I have been excluding myself a lot more recently. I don’t know why that is. I just need to find myself and I need to start getting it together so I can have the life that I dream of.

Think of something you want and write it down.

What are you doing to get/have that? Nothing really. I do sometimes buy things that I will use in my future house, but I guess that doesn’t help.

What are you doing to get in your way? I am spending all of the money I have on things that I don’t need.

How are you when you get what you want? I am happy and all thrillish. I feel like the world is wonderful and I will have everything I need. When I get some of the things I dream of I feel like everything is going to be alright and I will have the things I most desire.

How are you when you don’t get what you want? I feel down and worthless. I feel like my life will never change and I’ll never get those big things.

How do you keep from having what you want?

I choose instant gratification over waiting and saving for what I want.

I avoid spending time with friends because I don’t want them to regect me.

I avoid conversations because I think I have nothing intelligent to say and I am also afraid they won’t like what I have to say.

I feel like I don’t deserve the things I want most so I don’t actively strive to get them.

What did you get that you’re not satisfied with that causing you to want what you’re wanting now?
That’s interesting. I don’t think we really think about that much. There are many things that I receive that I am happy with, but I guess those are not the things I truly desire. I want things that I think a lot of people want in life, but I would really like to have those things…that life…sooner than later and worrying about the possibility of never having a home to call my own or children to share life with scares me. It really scares me to the point were I have nervous anxiety attacks.

The book goes on to talk about The Four Causes of Suffering. Those are:

• Not getting what you want.
• Getting what you want and not being satisfied with it.
• Having to endure the absence of those or that which you love.
• Having to endure the presence of those or that which you do not love.

List the ten things that are most important to you.

• 1) Kimberly
• 2) My car, Lucy.
• 3) My jobs.
• 4) My friends & family.
• 5) My shoes.
• 6) My purses.
• 7) My jewelry.
• My ambitions.
• 9) My dogs.
• 10) Reading.

More from the workbook. I think this will eventually become a weekly post, but I still have some entries saved up so I’ll post them daily until I am caught up.

Where do you want to be in 5 years? (Age 27)

• I would want to be in college working towards a degree or graduated and working towards a job or graduated with a job in my field.
• Have my name change completed.
• Working toward my goals.
• Have some money saved.

10 years? (Age 32)

• Have a career.
• Have children.
• Have a home.
• Live in a new city.

15 years? (Age 37)

• Have a decent savings.
• Make sure to keep everything exciting! (trips, decorating, love life, etc…)
• Live in a place you love.

20 years? (Age 42)

• Have a lot of fun.
• Be happy.
• Continue my education.

What are you doing now that will lead to that?

• I am setting goals for myself and striving to meet them.
• Even though I have been given a lot of road blocks with school I am still applying and working towards my education and thinking about my future career.
• The Mrs. and I are becoming more and more of a family every year so I feel confident we will get a lot of the things we want so badly.

What are you doing that will keep you from that?

• I lack confidence in myself.
• I put off the things I want most because I am scared of not achieving them.
• I worry about not being smart enough.
• I worry about not having the skills to do certain things.

Looking at yourself…

What I’ve been told about me… That I am smart, happy, confident, outspoken, fun, goofy, imaginative, quirky, insubordinate, free spirited, mean, nice, easy to talk to, uninhibited, sweet, sexy, loveable, amazing, wonderful, forgetful, hard to talk to, lazy, etc…

What I tell myself about me… I am not as good as others, forgetful, disillutioned, messed-up, cranky, foggy, stupud, annoying, not going anywhere, not lovable, bad at conversation, etc…

What I really know about me… I try hard, I really do mean the best, I want the world to be better, my biggest dream is to own a home (more than I want children), I love color and books and jewelry and clothing.

What would make your life perfect?

• A job that I enjoy
• Having a family
• Having a home
• Being happy.

What do you choose instead?

• I live day to day.
• I focus on goals instead of actively getting to them.
• I choose to spend my money on thing that will make me happy in the moment instead of saving for things that will make me ultimately happy.

Write a horoscope for yourself for the upcoming year.

This year I will get more serious about getting the things that I desire.

This year I will learn that I can save money.

This year will be the year that I transition from settling to going out and actively getting what I want.

I WILL BE HAPPY!

I bought this book a while back and I worked in it a little, but then I put it down and did not touch it again until today. I figured since I already have this website and I pay for it and everything I might as well work through the workbook online. We’ll see how this goes. I’m sure many of you remember my Money Project that I wasn’t really able to stick to. The book, by the way, is How You Do Anything Is How You Do Everything. Some of it I’ll take pictures of because you have to draw and all of that. Just be nice to me. I am a girl with some issues and I want to try to work on them. So here we go!

The first thing I needed to do was sit down and Draw a picture of life.

I (with my terrible artistic skills) is a home with flowers in the yard. There is a sign outside that says Our Home. The sun is nicely shining down. The Mrs. and I are standing outside with our two children. There is a grassy hill going up with a flower and a big tree. There is also a pond and a duck next to it. That would be my ideal life.

Next activity: What were the most important steps that brought you to where you are today?

• Being born.
• Having Siblings.
• Living in my town.
• Sharing rooms, when I was younger it was my sister and until I was 10 it was with my brother.
• My sister being a mom figure to me.
• Spending a lot of time when I was younger with my mom.
• Having a cousin who lives close by who is almost the same age as me.
• Preschool friends and playing wih the Jack-in-the-box.
• Elementry school – not as smart as everyone else, scared, worried, feeling uglier, lack of good friends, always in trouble.
• Parents always working.
• Home alone – self sufficient, stable, alright, sad, but content.
• Middle school – fun, but also when things went wrong friends either moved or stopped being friends with me.
• Junior High – bad grades, trouble often, friend named Sara who wasn’t good for me, drugs, drinking, cutting, depression
• The Mrs. – Meeting her, best friends, dating.
• High School – behind in classes, new awesome best friend Donna, child development, not graduating on time, feeling left back.
• Jobs – working hard, all the time, trying to be on my own.
• Summer school – graduation
• Everyone else started to go to college.
• Worked and left home.
• Lived in two different apartments, both fell through.
• Back at home trying new jobs trying to move forward and have the things I want in life.

Draw a picture of yourself at work:

Describe the qualities of this person:

• Frazzled
• Confused
• Annoyed
• Worried
• Unmotivated
• Uninformed
• Soft Spoken
• Care Taker
• Responsible
• Determined
• Unqualified
• Feeling stupid
• Sullen
• Nervous

Draw a picture of yourself at play:

Describe the qualities of this person:

• Happy
• In Love
• Calm
• Stimulated
• Engaged
• Motivated
• Fun
• Quirky
• Well Dressed
• Fun
• Pretty
• Loved
• Creative

Draw a picture of yourself at home:

Describe the qualities of this person:

• Lost
• Scared
• Worried
• Thinking about The Mrs.
• Holding my belongings
• Thinking about where home might be.

Where I live the day it turns from August to September the leaves seems to burst into color and then start falling from the trees. I took two pictures to document this while at my Maternal Grandparent’s home on Labor Day.

Also for your enjoyment is the back of my Grandfather’s Ford truck…

and my older dog Willow sleeping on some of my moms papers.

I am trying to get back into the flow of writing almost daily again because I got out of it for so long. Bear with me through these first couple entries until I get a new feel for it.
I didn’t use the term meme before now because I didn’t really know what it mean’t and I wasn’t going to be the person to ask. I found the definition on Stacitee’s site.
*Definition of a meme according to Pariah S. Burke… “In Blogspeak, a meme is an idea that is shared and passed from blog to blog, like a question posted in one blog and answered in many other blogs.” Okay! Now we know.

This one I got from HLH.

1. WHAT TIME DID YOU GET UP THIS MORNING? I woke up with the alarm at 7:00am. The Mrs. got in the shower and I stayed in bed until after she left for work at around 8:10 at which point I forced myself into the shower.
2. DIAMONDS OR PEARLS? It depends. I am big on diamond rings (even though I don’t own one), but there is something about pearl necklaces that I can not get enough of.
3. WHAT WAS THE LAST FILM YOU SAW AT THE CINEMA? Pirates of the Caribbean 2. Not my cup of tea. Too much action.
4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE T. V. SHOW? GREY’S ANATOMY!!!
5. WHAT DID YOU HAVE FOR BREAKFAST? This morning I had a huge 20 oz. cup of coffee and a small bowl of Apple Jacks.
6. WHAT IS YOUR MIDDLE NAME? You bring up a sensitive subject. Let’s just say when I finally go through with my name change it will be the same as what my real first name is now.
7. FAVORITE CUISINE? Really good Japanese. I am also a fan of those fancy California style places that also serve sushi.
8. WHAT FOODS DO YOU DISLIKE? The short list of foods I won’t eat contains anchovies (but I will eat ceaser dressing) and sardines. Aparently small whole fish gross me out. I also don’t like bread.
9. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CHIP FLAVOR? I don’t really like chips, but on the rare occasions I eat a sandwhich I get either plain baked Lays or salt and vinegar Pringles.
10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CD AT THE MOMENT? haha. I just broke down and bought Christina Aguilera’s new one. So I guess since I just paid for it, it’s my favorite.
11. WHAT KIND OF CAR DO YOU DRIVE? A silver Hyundai Sonata named Lucy.
12. FAVORITE SANDWICH? Bare with me here. My favorite sandwich I get at Subway on wheat and it is roasted chicken with swiss, pickels, black olives and chipotle dressing. I know.
13. WHAT CHARACTERISTIC DO YOU DESPISE? I don’t like people who are oppressive of others.
14. WHAT CHARACTERISTIC DO YOU LOVE MOST? I love people who are able to see joy in everyday life.
15. FAVORITE ITEM OF CLOTHING? Skirts.
16. IF YOU COULD GO ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD ON VACATION, WHERE WOULD YOU GO? While there are many places in the world I would like to see I would most like a weeklong vacation in Disney with The Mrs. followed by a weeklong cruise.
17. WHAT COLOR IS YOUR BATHROOM? It is completely themeless and void of decoration as it isn’t really my bathroom. The walls are wood paneling, the floor is off white linolium and the shower curtain is beige.
18. FAVORITE BRAND OF CLOTHING? I wear mostly Gap and Old Navy partially because I can fit into them and partially because The Mrs. gets a discount.
19. TO WHERE WOULD YOU RETIRE? Interesting question! If my dream of living in Portland, OR becomes a reality I think I would like to get a small house in the suburbs of OR to retire in.
20. WHAT WAS YOUR MOST MEMORABLE BIRTHDAY? I think it would be my 21st birthday when we went to a huge mall and I got my Tiffany Starfish necklace. We also saw an IMAX movie which I love. It was a lot of fun.
21. FAVORITE SPORT TO WATCH? None.
22. FURTHEST PLACE YOU ARE SENDING THIS? That depends who reads it.
23. WHO DO YOU LEAST EXPECT TO DO THIS? Whoever doesn’t want to.
24. PERSON YOU EXPECT TO DO THIS FIRST? Someone bored.
25. WHEN IS YOUR BIRTHDAY? In the lovely month of July.
26. WHEN IS YOUR ANNIVERSARY? In January!
27. ARE YOU A MORNING PERSON OR A NIGHT PERSON? Morning when I have gotten enough sleep.
28. WHAT IS YOUR SHOE SIZE? 9 1/2
29. PETS: A 6 year old lab mix named Willow and 2 year old cocker spaniel named Little Satan *ahem* Sebastian and a lonely little female betta fish named Glitter.
30. ANY NEW AND EXCITING NEWS YOU’D LIKE TO SHARE WITH US?I have grown in 2″ of my original hair color!
31. WHAT DID YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU WERE LITTLE? Wonderful.
32. HOW ARE YOU TODAY? Thank you for asking. I am much better than yesterday to the point where I am very nearly in a good mood.
33. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CANDY? Chocolate! From Godiva! I love their truffles and fresh dipped fruit and have you ever had their chocolate drinks or their…
34. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FLOWER? I love flowers, but as a favorite I suppose I would go with lilacs. That smell is Spring.
35. WHAT IS A DATE ON THE CALENDAR YOU ARE LOOKING FORWARD TO? I really don’t have anything major coming up that I am looking forward to. Did I mention I am working on the happy thing? Because I am.
36. WHERE IS THE FURTHEST YOU HAVE EVER BEEN FROM HOME? I guess the Caribbean.
37. A SMALL THING YOU REALLY ENJOY? Car rides with The Mrs.

I have no plans for tonight, but The Mrs. doesn’t get home until 11:30 p.m. from work tonight. This weekend seems to be shaping up nicely. Tomorrow I am going to a first birthday party for one of my best friends babies. In the morning before we go The Mrs. and I are going to Barnes & Noble so she can get a book for school and so I can get Down Came the Rain by Brooke Sheilds. (I know.) Saturday night I am going out to dinner with my parents and two of there old friends from the church they used to go with. They haven’t all been out together in five years. They were very nice so I am looking forward to seeing them again. However if anything relationship related comes up for me during the dinner I may hang myself in the bathroom. Just warning you all if you don’t hear from me again.

Sunday I am going to my friend Ariana’s families BBQ. I am looking forward to that quite a lot. The Mrs. can’t come which is a bummer, but I always have a good time when I am there. Then on Monday I am going to a picnic at my maternal grandparent’s house because it is aparently Labor Day and I have off of work. My mom’s youngest brother will be there as well as my aunt and their three kids including the new baby that was born just November. More details to come.