Listen, I have small breasts. Please don’t try to reason with me that I don’t. I think learning my cup size usually astonishes people. I also think you might have to have naked time with me to take in the actual size of my breast when they aren’t being thrust forward and up by an fantastically supportive bra.
I am a B cup. STAY WITH ME! I swear this is true. I have had many circle discussions about this wherein other people often try to convince me that my breasts can not possibly be that small. They are. I have many bras in this size and they fit perfectly. I have a few bras in larger cup sizes and they fit miserably with the under wire digging into my arm pits.
I also have pretty much the biggest nipples ever. (I realize you don’t need to know this, but we are having share time right now) I bring this up because it adds to the fact that I have strange magical boobies* because they are small and squishy and half of my entire breast is covered in nipple. I have seen a lot of breasts and only twice have I seen someone with nipples as big as mine and both times they were on someone who had a cup size of at least a DD. At least!
Though to look at me with my fantastic support you would have no idea about any of this, which is I think where the confusion comes in. I also can’t really do cleavage. In a certain bra, from a certain angle, in a certain pose I can give you the illusion, but busty I am not.
I have photo evidence of why I don’t think people believe me. This from a certain angle photo in the perfect bra in the perfect pose would led someone to make assumptions and I can’t say I would blame them.
This is why my breast are magic. Sometimes they look HUGE and perfect.
Here is a brief photo montage of times I should have had visible cleavage, but due to my situation, didn’t.
I’ll leave you with one last example of my B cups breasts disguising as Ds.
So I suppose that is my secret talent. I have magical boobies that seem huge until I am naked and then they seem to shrink.
I have maintained that besides porcelain veneers** the top cosmetic surgery I would consider is a boob job. Yet, as they are now they have been called the perfect handful and I suppose I wouldn’t want to mess with that. Also, I think it helps to find someone who likes something you have. Mine? She likes butts***. Now boobs I may not have, but butts? That I most definitely have!
Do any of you have any weird things like this with your body? Or any secret talents that don’t really do anything for you?
* I don’t mean magical in the same way as Loralee though I shamelessly stole this phrase from her.
** Yeah…my teeth are the #1 thing I dislike about myself. I’ll save that one for some other time.
*** TMI?
Kate says:
I was sitting here thinking “No, my nipples are huger than yours, if not just as huge”..then I read DD.. sorry, that’s me.
So I see your point.
I think it’s amazing what your bra does for you!
I have to say.. I know someone with smaller boobies than yours..
I was a “B” cup while developing in jr. high school and my best friend told me I had huge tits. And I was JUST a B cup.
so, there you go.. you have her beat!
Yes, she’s an A cup.
I don’t know if that makes you feel any better.. but when I read you are a B cup, it reminded me of the time my friend told me my tits were huge - when I was a B cup.
So yeah, your tits are huge!!
Hence the term “magical”.
July 7th, 2008 at 9:27 am
natalie says:
oh angela! i was cracking up at this post. first of all i got to the magical boobies and started laughing. i had read loralee’s post earlier today so i knew about that already! then the fact that you took pictures of your boobs…and wanted people to compare the pictures. died! you are so funny!
i don’t know if i have any hidden talents…hm…my eyes change colors some. blue if i’m wearing blue, green if i’m wearing green, and i’ve been told they are smokey when i am feeling a little sultry. not sure how much of a talent that is though.
July 7th, 2008 at 10:05 am
Angela says:
Kate - That does make me feel better. Haha. It’s just so obscure and while at the leadership institute it came up during one of our girl talks and it reminded me that I have wanted to talk about this. At least yours grew! I used to be convinced mine would get bigger when I got older, but alas they just seem to get droopier and a bit deflated.
Natalie - That is exactly what I am talking about! Secret talents that are sort of cool, but do absolutely nothing. Changing eye color fits the bill. Plus pretty awesome!
July 7th, 2008 at 10:49 am
Loralee says:
HEE! This post is awesome. I think some of the amazing size that can come off with is also due to the fact that you are a smaller girl. You are short and have a tiny build. A B to you would NOT be what they would look like on me, but they are still B’s.
My boobs would look GINORMOUS on you but they look reasonable on me because I have the LARGEST RIBCAGE KNOWN TO MAN.
My dr. was blown away. To look like a full C to D my doctor had to put in much more saline than he normally does.
July 7th, 2008 at 12:23 pm
Jill - GlossyVeneer says:
I’m a B cup and have NEVER managed to attain cleavage like you’ve got in some of those shots (much to my hubby’s chagrin). We always talk about how I’ll get a boob job after kids (gotta breast feed), the main reason for that would be to just chop them off and eliminate that cancer risk that runs in my family - but bigger boobs would be a happy side effect.
My mom would die if she knew I wrote this here, but… Before she had her mastectomy/reconstruction she was an A cup with huge nipples. She always hated that, and that’s probably the only thing she really likes about having her new boobs. Well, that and diminished cancer risk… but since she’s already had cancer twice now the risks are in the cancer showing up somewhere else.
Wow… I just brought this post down, didn’t I? Don’t meant to be a downer! I’ll shut up now!
July 7th, 2008 at 1:02 pm
Alice says:
You must be my booby twin. People always think my boobs are bigger than they are because I’m tall-ish. Trust me folks, a C just leaves all sorts of gaping fabric.
Great, funny post!
July 7th, 2008 at 4:52 pm
Rhi says:
It seems I have the opposite - I’m actually a C cup - but appear to be an a cup.
July 7th, 2008 at 4:52 pm
Angela says:
Loralee - Did you just say I have a tiny build? I know you are talking bone structure, but somehow I still want to hug you.
You’re large ribcage is something a lot of singer long for. I think that is awesome. I have a pretty small ribcage and thus my lung intake (or whatever) is pitiful.
Jill - Haha! I think that is sole benefit of my weight. I’m a bigger person so my weight makes them look a lot bigger too. There is something cool about being able to pick out your own breasts though.
You didn’t bring down the post at all. It is so scary that cancer gene thing and I wish they would be able to have something to reverse it so that these extremes wouldn’t have to be taken. You know I always keep you and your mom in my thoughts.
Alice - Yes! While mine may appear big sometimes I sure feel like the smallest busted person EVER when trying on tops. There have been so many cute shirts I tried on that I just could not fill out.
Rhi - Somehow I am not sure which I would prefer. LOL.
July 8th, 2008 at 7:24 am
Kyle says:
I have the opposite problem… I wish I didn’t have any boobies at all!
Uh, sometimes you have so much clevage I can’t stop starring at it… and I don’t even like boobs.
July 8th, 2008 at 9:43 pm
One Scrappy Gal says:
My boobies aren’t magical, but I drive a magical van. No matter how high I go over the speed limit (no more than 10 over)… I never get pulled over. Because even though I am going fast, from the outside, it looks like I’m going slow. I better knock it off though.
July 9th, 2008 at 7:20 am
Angela says:
Kyle Number one: Haha! Number two: I am taking that as a very high compliment to my cleavage. Thank you! Usually I can’t get any at all.
One Scrappy Girl - That is so funny!
July 9th, 2008 at 7:43 am
SparklieSunShine » Rockstar Blogger For A Day says:
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July 13th, 2008 at 4:43 am